rethinking balance.

Libra - The Scales

There's a very small percentage of me that buys into astrology. However, in the spirit of my birthday being next week, I did a little research about my astrological sign. I'll be honest, I was also bored in class and had exhausted both Pinterest and my bookmarked blogs. What else is a girl to do besides research astrology? My research came up with less than promising results. Apparently, libras are outgoing and charming and the peacemakers of the zodiac, along with a whole host of other general characteristics. While I think these things are true of myself, I know a decent number of people who embody those characteristics but aren't libras, which is why I don't buy into astrology.

However, the symbol of being a Libra is the scales, representing a desire to live in harmony, balance, and symmetry. That, I think is true. I'll go with that. I think it's fitting, especially considering the words I've been praying over for this school year. One of the main words I've been desiring is balance. 


Through conversations with friends in the past month, I've started rethinking balance. It's easy for me, I'm realizing, to look at balance as everything being equal. I can get so zone-focused on dividing my time and my energy into equal parts. Young Life should get the same amount of time as school. Friends should get the same attention as family. Running should happen as often as I do homework. Prayer should be equal with how much time I spend on Facebook. I want everything to be equal all the time. Equal time for friendships. Equal time for school. Equal time for fun. Equal time for reading. Isn't that what being balanced is? According to a quick Google search, it's an even distribution of something. An even distribution of time and energy? If I divide my day evenly between tasks, is it successful? If I check everything off of my to-do list and somehow attend to all of the things that need to happen, it's balanced? Even if I've only given a portion of the time and energy that they deserve?

Here's what I'm realizing and working through: that's not right. Something is wrong with the way I've been thinking about balance. Lots of things, actually. I've fallen way off track with how I've been praying for balance and how it's been lived out in my life so far this school year. And this isn't how I intended it to be, nor how I want it to stay.

I want to seek out balance in my life, first through God. Everything I've been given is a gift from Him, and I want to live like it is. I do not want to live my story thinking it's about me. When I think about balance in the way that I have been, it makes the story about me: what do I need to do, where does my energy need to be, how can I efficiently plow through everything all the time. But the story is not about me at all. It's all about Him. It's all for His glory. I want to hold tight to that and remind myself of it daily (sometimes hourly). I want my prayers to center on this: that my time, my energy, and my talents be used to bring Him glory. I feel like that's going to be the best way for me to find balance. If I'm seeking first His Kingdom and His glory, I think the balance part will fall into place, right?

Instead of using my energy to cross things off a to-do list and stress myself out about making everything perfectly equal, I want to use my energy to seek His balance for my life. I want to seek Him for how to distribute my time and energy, glorifying Him in the process, and ultimately, finding the best balance: a balance that He's chosen. A balance that may not consist of equal parts everything, but is much more real and much more God-centered. That sounds much better than the way I have been living.

This is obviously a train of thought that's still in progress. My thinking is continuing to evolve, and I want you to be a part of the journey with me. Because I don't have all the answers.

What do you think about balance? How do you find balance in your life? Does being balanced mean that everything has to be equal for it to be right?