goals and plans.

I learned a lot of things during my student teaching. Some things are obvious - like how to take attendance, count lunch money, and facilitate morning routine all at once - and others are more subtle - like the value of showing your emotions as they happen.

Without a doubt, I learned (and mastered) lesson planning during my four months in room 104. I wrote lesson plans for observations, lesson plans in bulleted lists when I was pressed for time, and lesson plans on the fly when something went awry with my kids. These days, it seems I could write a lesson plan in the blink of an eye. I can tell you with confidence that the best way to plan for instruction is to start broad and work down (using the principles of Backwards Design). Start big picture and take small steps to get there. You start with a goal and work your way down to the plans.

I taught a unit on community helpers a few months ago:

My goal? Students will understand the roles of various community helpers. Goals tend to be broad, big picture, and somewhat abstract in nature.

My plans? They varied day to day. Plans are the specific details, procedures, and how of execution. In that community helpers unit, we cut, matched, and pasted pictures. We dressed up as various community helpers. We read books and watched movies. We used puppets. We played games. Sometimes all on the same day.

Lesson plans can look a multitude of different ways, but they all end up working toward that preset goal. 

So often I use the goals and plans interchangeably in conversation; assuming that goals are the same thing as plans, but they are not the same. Goals are the big picture, broad ideas I have for my life. My goals include things like being a teacher and having a family someday. Plans are the specifics, definites, and concretes. My immediate plans include things such as going to the bank and packing a few boxes tomorrow.

I am coming to terms with the thought that goals and plans are different; with the idea that I have may have a goal, but that doesn't mean I have only one plan. Student teaching, and life, are showing me that it's good to have a goal, an end in sight. But, there is more than one way to reach the goal. There are many different plans and paths that can get you to the goal. Maybe it's my responsibility as a teacher to make a few plans, go for it, and see what happens.

My most recent goal? Become a teacher. Inspire. Empower. See differences as beautiful. Include. Be a committed and dedicated teacher to the students entrusted to me.

My most recent plans? Who knows. Open. Undecided. Unknown.


What are you goals? Your plans? Do you think there's a difference between having goals and having plans? 

"When will it get easier?"

Wow. It's been awhile! The past month of life has been crazy, an absolute whirlwind of life and change, parties and celebration, hellos and goodbyes. I've sat down to write a handful of times, never certain of how to start or what to say. Notes and ideas for blog posts abound in my journal, I just haven't been able to get anything out. I think that's okay. It's a lot to process. I think I am ready to start writing again, at least for tonight.

I spent the majority of yesterday in Milwaukee with my sister, brother-in-law, and sweet new nephew Dane. Have you met Dane yet? Allow me to introduce you.

He's adorable, I know. Don't let the sweet sleeping picture fool you. He is adorable, I'm not denying that. But he can be, according to my brother-in-law, a crying fuss bucket. I spent the majority of yesterday with my little Danish, and he spent a lot of that time screaming. Hungry? Cold? Tired? Cranky? Sleepy? We're not too sure. It was a guessing game to figure out what he needed and how we could give it to him. 

At some point during the day, my sister asked in defeat and desperation, "When will it get easier?" Honest. Tired. Real. She was unfiltered and uninhibited, exhausted and straightforward. 

When will it get easier? When will it feel real? When will it stop? Go? Move? When will I understand it? When will I feel like I have a handle on it? 

You could be asking these questions about parenting, about changing jobs, about graduating college, about saying hello and saying goodbye, about a thousand things in life. 

As I move through a particularly tumultuous and uncertain season of life, I am starting to realize that it may never get easier. I may never fully understand the roles and spaces that I enter into. I may not ever have a handle on the fact that life, whether in this season or another, is uncertain and uncanny and unknown. Life is not static and just as I figure out one thing, another thing gives way. Life doesn't stop and doesn't give us answers. 

Luckily for Katie, I think it will get easier. I think as the days and weeks pass, she will get into a rhythm with Dane. They will learn one another; she will learn his cues and he will learn how to communicate his needs more effectively. He will learn to sleep, and it will get easier as she and Mark become more rested. I do think that as some things get easier, others will become more difficult. As Dane grows, Katie and Mark will become comfortable but will still daily face the unknown paths of parenting. 

I want to make friends with the idea that this whole thing called life might not ever get easier. Maybe that's the wrong question for me to even be asking. Regardless, I want to make friends with the idea that I'll always be facing the unknown and I won't always understand it or be able to solve it or fix it.

For tonight, I am okay with that. There's a great sense of peace that comes with not knowing and being okay with not knowing. It's a type of free-fall, to know that I don't have all the answers, but I'm not supposed to have all the answers. To know that this season is not easy, but it might not ever feel easy. For now, I am okay with that.